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🧔🏽♂️ Dad Thoughts: In My Opinion
White noise isn’t for the baby. It’s for the parents, so they can actually talk to each other without whispering like they’re in a library. This should be more obvious.
We should phase out “in my opinion.” Just assume everything anyone says is an opinion, unless it starts with “factually speaking.” Then it’s conversationally appropriate to ask for a source.
Factually speaking, there’s nothing better than coming home to a house full of laughter and chatter. Or complete silence because everyone’s asleep. Or out of the house.
Dad jokes don’t have to be funny. They’re a show of confidence, performed by a man who whiffed on so many jokes in his younger days that he stopped caring. Progression through rejection.
Getting to the airport early is all about adding more time to the vacation. JFK has a speakeasy that opens at 11:30 AM, and a cocktail at that hour is perfectly acceptable when you’re about to board. See you there.
Sources available upon request.
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🚗 FAMILY FUN FIELD TRIPS
Dad-approved outings.
This Weekend → 🎃 Spooky Fest at the Center for Science Teaching & Learning
The best pick-your-scare-level Halloween night in Nassau. Little ones do the Enchanted Forest Walk with cute dinosaurs, crafts, face painting and glow slime, while big kids can brave the Spooky Woods. A nonprofit fundraiser in a nature preserve that feels homegrown in the best way.
💰 $22 non-scary ticket / $27 all attractions
📅 Fri-Sun, Oct 23–25, 6–9 PM
🔗 cstl
👻 Ghostly Gala at the Long Island Children's Museum
LICM's biggest Halloween night: trick-or-treating through the museum, a Monster Mash dance party, a spooky studio with mystery cauldrons, and creepy crafts to take home. Add the Uncle Vlad's Pumpkin Patch theater show for a few bucks more.
💰 $18 non-members / $16 members; theater add-on $5 / $4
📅 Sat Oct 24, 6–9 PM
🔗 licm
🍬 Trick-or-Treating + Not-So-Spooky Ghost Puppet Show
Trick-or-treating through the gardens with nut-free candy, then a puppet show in the Barn where a shy little ghost’s candy goes missing and a kid detective has to crack the case. It’s also Fall Dog Days, so expect costumed pups on the paths. Spooky, not scary.
💰 $22 adults / $12 ages 7–17 / free 6 and under; puppet show $18 adults / $12 kids 3+
📅 Sun Oct 25, trick-or-treating 10:30 AM, puppet show 1 PM
🔗 oldwestburygardens
Next Weekend → 👻 Oyster Bay Halloween Ghost Walk & Dance Party
Raynham Hall’s lantern-lit costume parade through downtown Oyster Bay, led by giant ghost puppets, ending in a DJ dance party at the Townsend Park bandstand. Bring lanterns and noisemakers. Food trucks line the route.
💰 Free
📅 Fri Oct 30, 6–8:30 PM, parade starts at Oyster Bay High School
🔗 raynhamhallmuseum
🎃 1880s Haunted Halloween at Old Bethpage Village Restoration
Trick-or-treating through a historic 19th-century village, a children's costume parade and contest, and a Sleepy Hollow marionette show. A perfectly spooky-not-scary Halloween outing for younger kids.
💰 $17 adults / $14 kids ages 5+
📅 Sat Oct 31–Sun Nov 1, 10 AM–4 PM
🔗 oldbethpagevillagerestoration
🚀 STEM•X Festival at the Cradle of Aviation Museum
Two days of hands-on STEM inside the museum: robotics, coding, VR, drones and more. A perfect post-Halloween sugar-crash Sunday.
💰 Free
📅 Sat Oct 31–Sun Nov 1, 10 AM–3 PM
🔗 cradleofaviation
🎃 ALL OCTOBER LONG
For when the weekend plan falls through.
🍂 Hicks Nurseries Fall Festival
The easy, free, any-day fall outing. Otto the Ghost's animated walkthrough and the indoor Skeleton Estate Garden are spooky-cute, not scary, and on weekends the wristband activities and hay maze turn a pumpkin run into a real morning out.
💰 Free admission and parking; hay maze $8; activity wristband $25 online / $30 in store
📅 Daily through Nov 1; wristband activities weekends and holidays, 10 AM–5 PM
🔗 hicksnurseries
🌽 Heritage Farm & Garden Fall Festival
A true farm-style fall festival without leaving Nassau: a corn maze, hayrides, a pumpkin patch, farm animals, a kids' village, and live music on weekends. Everything you want from a farm day, minus the drive east.
💰 $25 weekend package / $15 weekdays; crafts $5 each
📅 Daily through Nov 1, 10 AM–4:30 PM
🔗 heritagefarmandgarden
🎨 Scarecrow Garden at Old Westbury Gardens
A gentle Halloween stroll through one of Long Island's prettiest estates, lined with community-built scarecrows that run from charming to wonderfully weird. Kids can vote for a favorite by QR code through Oct 24, and the fall color makes it an easy photo morning.
💰 Included with admission: $22 adults / $12 ages 7–17 / free 6 and under
📅 Daily through Oct 31 (closed Tuesdays), 10 AM–6 PM
🔗 oldwestburygardens
👻 Not-So-Scary Days at Bayville Scream Park
The daytime, kid-safe side of Long Island's most hardcore haunt: a pumpkin patch, a Halloween train, haunted bumper boats, pirate mini golf, and a funhouse with no actors jumping out. Built for kids under 10. Just be gone before the nighttime haunts open.
💰 Varies by time slot
📅 Weekends in October, 12–5 PM
🔗 bayvillescreampark
🕯️ RISE of the Jack O'Lanterns (Suffolk)
More than 7,000 hand-carved jack o'lanterns lining a wooded trail just over the Nassau line. The region's big pumpkin-art night walk, stroller-friendly but hilly. Online tickets only, so book early.
💰 Varies by time slot
📅 Select nights through Nov 1
🔗 jackolanterns
✏️ PENCIL IT IN
Future you will be glad you read this.
✨ LuminoCity Holiday Lights at Eisenhower Park
The LuminoCity Festival Lights comes to Nassau for the holidays. Super early bird 25% off running now.
💰 Adults $36, Children $28
📅 Wed Nov 11–Sun Jan 3
🔗 luminocityfestival
Two Things:
Forward this to Nassau County parents you think would appreciate it.
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See you next Thursday,
Akash